December, 2015
Unfortunately, I couldn't afford to pay for skype lessons this semester so I didn't have many opportunities to improve my speaking skills. I don't want to lie or pretend that I did many activities connected with speaking. I know that this part of my English is the worst and the reasons are obvious - there is no opportunity to talk to somebody regularly and also my attitude is not as good as it should be. Last semester I took some lessons on the skype. I had to learn and improve my pronunciation for "Phonetics and phonology". Moreover, I had to prepare for the final exam of Practical language so I was made to improve my speaking and I must say that I did well. In my opinion, speaking is a very important skill so I must change my attitude and think something up. It would be easier if I lived in Brno - there are many opportunities to take part in discussion groups, but I don't live there so it is absolutely useless to think this way. I remember that I talked to a stuffed toy when I was preparing for the final exam last semester and I found it really convenient, but it is so unnatural and that's why too difficult to do the activity for a long time. Too dificult, too difficult - that's exactly the attitude I have to deal with. I strongly believe that I'm the only person who can change even my whole life through my attitude, so it is up to me if I choose the "toodiffucult" attitude or the "nevergiveup" attitude. I feel guilty about my attitude to this particular activity, I really do but I don't want to look back. I want to rise from the dead and go ahead.
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Reflection:
I had an English conversation with my classmates Ilona and Peter in order to add something to my Portfolio. The conversation took about 25 minutes and I was quite surprised that I was able to speak with my colleagues for such a long time. They are also my friends so I felt really comfortable during our conversation.
It is obvious that my English is getting better and better during my study at the university - my vocabulary, grammar skills and so on. Each of the skills are also very useful for my spoken interaction. I've realized that the most difficult thing about the speaking is the very beginning. After about 10 minutes I stop being nervous and I don't care about the fact that I have to speak English. That's the good way of my speaking skills but unfortunately there is another way - It is recognisable that I'm not used to using English very often. I am not able to speak fluently and also my pronunciation is not very good. To be honest, I do not like this reflection because writing about my speaking skills makes me feel guilty and uncomfortable. Some people say that I am too critical to myself and I know they are right - that's the bad part of my personality I'd like to change but talking about my speaking skills, I think I am not overcritical. It's just a fact that this is the worst part of my English and the only person responsible for the fact is me.
Here is the record of the conversation:
